Mothers day

Another Mothers day. 

I'm gonna be honest, not negative, just honest.....

It's not my favorite thing to sing primary songs about mothers. I'm doing the best I can and I believe in having an "ideal" to work towards, but when I sing some of those songs all I feel is guilt. "Mother dear I love you so, your happy smiling face?????" Nope, don't think my kids will tell you that. "When I am near you, I love to hear you, singing so softly".... nope not that either. "I want to mind you, I want to find you, happy and smiling because I love you." Hmmmm it all sounds nice and it's cute when the kids sing it,(for proof of that click on Ryan and Camilla's blog to see their 2 1/2 yr old sing one. It's the sweetest thing ever) but sometimes I think we need to help our little primary children know the reality of being a mother and that it's not really about having a mom who sits in a bed of roses either praying or singing sweet songs with a smiling face all day long.

Here's the reality.....

the other night Mike was at his parents helping fix a sprinkler so I was home with the 3 kids by myself. I was trying to get them ready for bed and the baby was laying on the couch screaming bloody murder, the kid normally never cries. Then Jack was crying about something and I was trying to take care of him and Ivan came over with a basket ball and had to dribble the loud thing right next to me! With 2 other crying kids! I snapped, grabbed the ball from him and chucked it down the stairs. That was smart because then he started to cry. Fun! "your happy smiling face, is such a joy to look at" I really don't think so! I ordered them off to their room. A bit later I went in and tried to explain or apologize for getting mad and Ivan said, "mom, next time you take my ball from me you outta stop and think a minute about if you are going to throw it or not and make me cry." I had to laugh a little bit.

But I feel like times like that are more often than not. I kinda feel like we need to help our kids to learn to appreciate all the hard work and emotional wear and tear it is to be a mom. Not that they should feel like it's a drag to be their mother, but just help them to be real about it and be thankful for the hard work rather than be confused about why their mom isn't depicted in any of the songs. :)

Anyway- I love my children more than I can even express. It's hard! But I love it. Ivan has been saying some great things lately. We must be frustrated about the potty at our house because apparently it's been on his mind..... we went to lunch one day and I dropped my keys. He picked them up and said, "here mom, I'll get these for you cuz I know it's hard for you to bend over. And you know what mom? I'm even gonna wipe my own butt for you, so you don't have to bend over!" Then we missed the mothers day quiz at church so I just sat and asked him the questions later that night

My mom likes to- "stay in the house and not get cold"

My mom is good at- "wiping my butt"

What I love about my mom- "she wipes my butt for me"

My mom is special because-"she lets me spit my water in the sink"

My mom always says-"wipe your butt your own self"

What is something nice you are going to do for your mom today-"stand up on the stand"

(I think with that last one he knew I was kinda sad cuz he wouldn't go up on the stand and sing with all the kids)

I wonder if we'll find that in a primary song some day?

And sometimes when Ivan does something he's suppose to or is good to Jack I'll say something like, "see, now that's the Ivan I love and appreciate." So the other day I let him have a treat or something and he said, "see, now that's the mom I love."

Motherhood is definitely an interesting time. So much joy and so much pain. Wouldn't trade it for anything though.